my taxes pay for what the...?!?

Ok, so I knew it was the polite thing to do, but I never dreamed it was “the law” to get over on the opposite lane when there is a cop car on the shoulder with his lights flashing. I wanted to, but there was a car in the other lane. Getting over was not an option. So, I do the next best thing, I put my foot off the gas to slow down. Wouldn’t you know it not five minutes go by where I am being pulled over by two cop cars (because it takes two of course since I am such a dangerous criminal). It is late and the moon is hidden behind the clouds, leaving darkness over the highway. Blue and Red lights flash in my peripheral, while questions plague my mind. A young cop approaches my car window with cloths that obviously don’t fit him. The boy in blue demands my licenses. I knew I wasn’t speeding, so I was perplexed. “What did I do officer?” He looks at me like I should know, and with a attitude like John Wayne in a western he says “It’s against the law not to get over when a emergency vehicle is on the shoulder.” My face is contorted revealing my thoughts “you have got to be kidding”. Sadly, he wasn’t the joking type. Ten minutes later I get my license back with a “citation” and 110 dollar fine. I can’t believe it! I have gotten pulled over more than 20 times in my life for some of the ridiculous reasons, but that reason takes the cake and all the calories with it! So, let this be a lesson to the rest, get over.

a 'mormon'umental mistake....

Today was fall break, thankfully a break that included me jetting home to Michigan for some R&R. Something happened though that stuck out to me. On my way to RB (the tech building) on Ball State's campus I walked hurriedly by a pair of young men dressed in white & black suits. They were holding a sign on a wooden bench, trying to make eye contact with people. I thought they looked like the men in black, although a Will Smith was no where to be found and these guys were whiter than skim milk. The sign said "...Mormon..."... that explained the cloths. The boy (he didn't look older than 20) caught me staring at the sign and asked, "you know anything about Mormonism?". My eyes shifted from the poster to him as I hurriedly walked past them, "I'm Christian". I exclaimed in a louder than normal voice and my gaze quickly returned to my destination, the RB building. I could hear as I was walking away one of the young men asked "What did he say?...", and I think the other one exclaimed "He said he was Christian...". By then I had almost reached the building when it dawned on me.... what had I done? Here as a believer I am aways "called to give a reason for this hope that I believe"...that hope is Jesus, and they needed him more than I needed to get to RB. Guilt began to set in, I had a opportunity to wittiness and I hadn't taken it. "Why"? I asked myself. First reason, I didn't feel like defending the faith and getting into a long debate when I was on a deadline.... not an excuse! Second, it was fall break and I had only two hours to get everything done so I could leave. As I was doing my business in RB, those previous events haunted my psyche. "I am a Christian"... the words echoed in my head with a haunting sensation. Great, what had I done!?! The impression I had probably given them is that us so called "Christians" don't have time for them, were to busy involved in our own world. But I knew Christians like me should always have time to listen to those who's religion is different from our own. Not only do we need to show God's love for them and the truth of the Cross... but we need to also show them we value them as God does. These boys took time out of their day, and I couldn't even give them a second. Well, as you can tell, Jesus called me out on it, thankfully. Next time the situation arises, I will make the right choice. I can be so selfish, thankfully God works through situations like these to shape us into who he wants us to be. Sorry to my brothers and sisters out there for giving us a bad name, and if you see these Mormon friends... please say a few words for me.

do I live a lie?

"Were mildly attracted to Jesus’ virtues, but were strongly attracted to our vices. We wouldn't like to loose them because they please us, and the prospects of a significant life with Jesus doesn’t please us as much. Do we expect a new Christian life will just happen without us having to make inconvenient changes with how we live on Monday to Sunday? If so, were like people who want to be solvent, and max out their credit cards, or people who want to be sexually pure and bookmark porn sights. People who want to learn Chinese, but without all the tiresome study that is required with that. " That is from an article in Christianity today's September, 2006 episode. A powerful statement about self sacrifice. I have heard our spiritual nature and our human nature compared to Dog's. The one that we feed the most will obviously be the stronger one, and be able to over power the week. This suggestion technically isn't theologically sound, but I like it anyway. This is scary in a world where the average Christian only spends 4 minutes in prayer a day. I believe in Grace most of all, but that grace doesn’t justify our destruction of ourselves. The beauty of God though his Grace is He can allow any Sin in our lives to show us the freedom we can receive in Him.

Do you feel the Spirit?

How interesting it is in the Christian life that I haven't gotten in the habit to spiritually overcompensate. In fact, the idea was foreign to me till I heard A.W. Towzer mention it in a sermon. He also mentioned the following below:

Things that will fashion you whether you know it or not:
1. Literature you read- ideas fashion your mind like the author
2. Music you listen to- determines what your like inside
3. Pleasures we indulge in. nothing now, but look where it will lead in 15 years.
4. Ambitions we entertain- whatever you would like to be
5. Places we go- on way to heaven, where do you visit? Does it reflect where were going?
6. Words we speak- how careless we are with our speech, our jokes...
7. The friends we cherish- may be hardest aspect. Better break with certain friendships if you’re going to serve God. (Take up cross, turn our backs on everybody necessary, even family). Better have no friends but Christ, than full of friends in Sodom before it's destruction. Walk in counsel of Godly. To go back to this idea of overcompensation, combining it and the Christian walk makes sense, doesn’t it?

Most of my life I have undercompensated for Christ. Meaning; the time I spent with Him was minor, compared to all the other things I invested in my life in. It was five minutes of Christ, three hours of TV. 20 minutes of Prayer, 1 hour of homework. 3 hours hanging with friends, 10 minutes in God's Word. 1 hour eating, 0 time serving the poor. So what has changed? Not totally sure, but I know that the Sprit of the Lord is actively moving in me. I am not sure if my explanation grasps this radical change in my life, but the big change seemed to have occurred last week. I spent four hours in Romans, and afterward I felt cleansed, like God was once again my priority. It's not a hard process. Think about how people spend time tanning on the beach. What does one have to do get a tan? Does he/she have to negotionate with the sun to pour down on him/her? No, the Sun is always doing just that, all the individual has to do is take off his or her covering. Spending with Christ is the same way, we just expose ourselves to Him. My guess is we do this through Fellowship, His Word, Speaking Truth, and Prayer...etc. Then perhaps we will bear the mark, the evidence of being shined on from the Son. Never was a evil dead done that wasn’t thought about first. So Surrendering our time, our thoughts, our hearts to His service, then this Christian Life has begun. "God never tells us anything to get along without Him." - Towzer

And I begin again...

It has been a while since I have last written in this blog. It's a mixture of laziness, and thoughts of pointlessness. For who am i to speak when there is "Nothing new under the Sun"? Well, lets just say with that said I think I am going attempt more quoting on those who have said it before me. John Wesley was a famous preacher or the seventeenth century. Born in to poverty with 18 brothers and sisters, he managed to go to Oxford. May 24Th, 1738 at a prayer meeting God got a hold of him. I am taking an excerpt from his writings "Christian Perfection". Two of my greatest weaknesses of late are laziness and allowing my pleasures to not be fully rooted in Christ. "... (do not) expect the end without the means: expecting knowledge, for instance, without searching the scriptures and consulting with the people of God or expecting spiritual strength without constant prayer and steady watchfulness, or expecting God to bless you without hearing the word of God at every opportunity."
There are times I think that I can resist the temptations of this world, but I can't without diligence in my relationship with the Father. Wesley reminds me of this truth.
"Beware of thinking, 'because I have the love of God I do not need holiness,' or 'since I pray all the time I have no need for set times of private prayer' or 'because I am spiritual I have no need for self examination'"..."Do not allow the desire for tasteful food or any other pleasure of the senses, the desire of pleasing the eye or the imagination, the desire for money or praise or power, to rule you. While you have the ability to feel these desires, you are not compelled to feel them. Stand fast in the liberty wherewith Christ has made you free...Let others see that you are not interested in any pleasure that does not bring you nearer to God, nor regard any pain which does."
That is an intense statement, for I am quite far from only seeking the pleasure that appeases God. I truly realize what this means. If reading a book or watching a movie isn't glorying God, we must not pursue it. If playing a game or singing a song does not Glorify God, it probably isn't what we want to be doing. While this may seem somewhat legalistic, I assure you that a Spirit totally surrendered to God will have natural inclinations such as these. Perhaps we should all consider what it means to be "co-laborers". Being a Christian involves regular disciplines of prayer, fasting, solitude. There is no short-cuts to the "righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit" (1 Cor. 3:9, Rom 14:17).

Cost of Discipleship

After examining experts from Dallas Willard’s “The spirit of the Disciplines”, I am reminded that discipleship is not an option like purchasing that IPod or going out to eat instead would be. The following are excerpts that portray his wisdom in such matters:

“…The New Testament is a book about disciples,…all of the assurances and the benefits offered to humankind in the gospel evidently presuppose such a life and do not make realistic sense apart from it. The disciple of Jesus is not the deluxe or heavy duty model of the Christian…He stands on the pages of the New Testament as the first level of basic transportation in the Kingdom of God.
For at least several decades the churches of the western world have not made discipleship a condition of being a Christian…and one may remain a Christian without any signs of progress toward or in discipleship. …Most problems in contemporary churches can be explained by the fact that members have not yet decided to follow Christ. …When Jesus observed that one must forsake the dearest things – family, ‘all that he hath,’ and ‘his own life also’ (Luke 14)- insofar as that was necessary to accompany him, he stated a simple fact: it was the only possible doorway to discipleship. …The disciple of Christ desires above all else to be like him. …The Disciple is one who, intent upon becoming Christ like and so dwelling in his ‘faith and practice,’ systematically and progressively rearranges his affairs to that end. …. One cannot be a disciple of Christ without forfeiting things normally sought in human life, and that one who pays little in the world’s coinage to bear his name has reason to wonder where he or she stands with God. …The correct perspective is to see following Christ not only as the necessity that it is, but as the fulfillment of the highest human possibilities and as life on the highest plane.”

Check out Matthew 28-16-20 to find more reading on this. This week I must meditate on the Lordship of Christ. I do not believe my life currently reflects being under the authority of Jesus. Instead of focusing on the cost of giving these area’s over to Christ, I need to focus on the high price I pay by keeping them under my control.

Wisdom from Lewis

“The Christian way is different: harder, and easier. Christ says, ‘Give me All. I don’t want so much of your time and so much of your money and so much of your work: I want you. I have not come to torment your natural self, but to kill it. No half-measures are any good. I don’t want to cut off a branch here and a branch there, I want to have the whole tree down. Hand over the whole natural self, all the desires which you think innocent as well as the ones you think wicked- the whole outfit. I will give you a new self instead. In fact, I will give you Myself: my own will shall become yours.’” –C.S. Lewis

What are some of the reasons I fear giving my life completely to God? Perhaps because I want this life to be easy, and I know when I give it away to God it could become hard. I am lazy, and laziness means more work in the long run. Which areas of my life am I most reluctant to surrender to God? Currently it is my time and my eyes. I pour anything in that I want to, not contemplating on the consequences of such actions. In what ways have I experienced the heavy burden of trying to remain in control of my life? I don’t want to surrender to God every morning, and now I have come to the point where I feel I am faking Christianity. I need to return to the place where I diverged from my Heavenly Father, and ask for forgiveness and seek restoration.